I miss meat. I do. I wish I was stronger than I am. I have these grand plans that I’m going to be a vegetarian for a year and really try to make a difference in the world. I feel good about myself. I feel like those crunchy granola people must feel like when the shun restaurants that serve lobster. And then…

And then…I walk by the salad bar at Whole Foods and see the Chicken Caesar salad and I melt. I know I’ll make it through this week and I could probably even go a month. I feel like eventually this has to stop being so hard. I will probably forget my meat cravings eventually, right? RIGHT?

Augh. But I love meat too much. It’s a family thing. My wonderful family memories center around food. My dad has always been an excellent cook. So whenever I go home we gather in the kitchen and partake of one of my dad’s creations. For as long as I can remember he’s never really used a recipe. Occasionally he’ll take out the Joy of Cooking as a guideline but it’s only ever that. He works with his own style.

And because of that I don’t think I could ever avoid meat forever. But it is getting easier. Tonight I made my own version of a veggie burger–baked eggplant with cheese and ketchup. It was ooey gooey good. Mmmm…eggplant is one of my favorite vegetables.

Today I started thinking about meat. Just randomly…my favorite dishes. I can see in my mind what a perfectly cooked filet mignon looks like. I was thinking about my absolute favorite thing that my dad makes me. It’s Thai peanut chicken but that phrase doesn’t do it justice. It’s heaven. And yes, you can make it without the chicken and just put vegetables in. But it’s not the same…it loses its nostalgia.

I’m keeping to my word though. I refuse to back down because of random meat cravings and the longing I get at the Whole Foods hot food bar for Chicken Parmesan. I like eggplant parmesan. It’s just as good. I swear. And I have to think that if I keep eating veggies all the time I might actually have a healthier diet overall.

I’d like to get to the point where I’m not just reverting to eating cereal for dinner but I guess that will all depend on whether or not I stick with this whole vegetarian thing or give it up so as to free myself from ever having dreams of filet mignons chasing after me screaming “EAT ME!” I’d like to think it wouldn’t happen, but knowing what I dream about now it’s a distinct possibility.

Today my best friend challenged me to be a vegetarian for a week. I took the bet. And here, I will chronicle what it’s like to be a non-meat eater for a week and perhaps longer. I’ve never been particularly good at not eating something but I am remarkably good at being stubborn and ornery. And this is one bet I refuse to lose.

Anyone who is a vegan flat-out amazes me. Not eating meat isn’t that big of a deal to me. I like chicken and beef and even the occasional rasher of bacon but I’m not fussed if I can’t have it. But I cannot live without dairy. I LOVE cheese. I have practically lived off of greek yogurt the last few weeks. It’s wonderful. And so even though I’m mostly lactose intolerant I refuse to give up dairy.

Eggs would be the killer for me. I drink soy milk rather regular milk already and I’ve already stopped eating ice cream for the most part. (Except for the absolutely divine gelato place down the street that I can not be kept away from by any means.) But I love eggs. A plate full of eggs covered in ketchup with a side of home fries is my favorite meal at the moment. I could eat it everyday for months and never get sick of it.

So for the next week expect to hear me waxing lyrical about sweet potato fries (Whole Foods makes amazing ones that I get for lunch), the amazing pasta-eggplant-broccoli dish that I love to make, and every possible kind of salad I can think to make on short notice.

This should be interesting.